Pain-Free Sex: Tips and Positions for Comfortable Intimacy

Sex is many things, but it should never be painful. Unfortunately, many people still believe that pain during sex is normal. In reality, it is a problem that needs to be addressed. In this article, we will discuss the causes of pain during sex and provide tips and comfortable sex positions to help you and your partner have a pleasurable, pain-free experience.

What Causes Pain During Sex?

Before we dive into the solutions, it’s important to understand the potential causes of pain during sex. According to ACOG, the following factors may contribute to discomfort during intercourse:

Lack of Desire

If one partner is not in the mood for sex, their body may not be open to stimulation, and this can cause pain during penetration.

Lack of Arousal

Emotions play a significant role in how we experience sex. Negative emotions towards sex can lead to discomfort or pain during intercourse.

How Can I Avoid Pain During Sex?

Now that we have identified the causes, let’s look at some tips to avoid pain during sex, recommended by Healthline:


Effective communication is crucial in all aspects of a relationship, including sex. Openly discussing your likes, dislikes, and preferences can help you both avoid activities that may cause discomfort or pain.

Check with Your Doctor

If you are experiencing pain during sex, it’s important to consult a healthcare professional. They can help you identify any underlying medical conditions that may be contributing to your discomfort.


Scheduling special days for intimacy can help you and your partner prepare mentally and physically, reducing the risk of discomfort or pain.

Lube and Pace

Using lubrication can reduce friction and make penetration more comfortable. Additionally, taking things slow and easing into different positions can help you avoid pain during sex.

Positions for Comfortable Sex

Trying different sex positions can help you find what works best for you and your partner. Here are some comfortable positions to try, courtesy of HealthShots:


Spooning is a comfortable position where the receiving partner is hugged from behind by the giving partner. This position allows for shallow thrusts, making penetration easier to manage.


In this position, the receiving partner is on top, giving them control over the depth and pace of penetration.


Standing sex can be done in the shower, with your bodies pressed against each other. This position limits the depth of penetration, making it more comfortable.


Doggy style is a classic position that can be modified for comfort. The addition of a hip lift can reduce the risk of pain during penetration.


This position involves oral stimulation rather than penetration, making it a great option for those who are still hesitant about inserting a penis or strap.


Nearly 75% of women experience pain during sex at some point in their lives. It’s important for partners to practice patience, empathy, and communication in order to find ways to avoid discomfort and pain. Remember, sex should be a pleasurable experience for both partners, and taking the time to find what works best for you can deepen your relationship and bring you closer together.